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R.I.P. Common Sense |
“Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense,
who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he
was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red
tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons
as:-Knowing when to come in out of the rain; – Why the early bird gets
the worm;- Life isn’t always fair; – And maybe it was my fault. Common
Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies, don’t spend more than
you can earn and adults, not children, are in charge. His health began
to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations
were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual
harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for
using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an
unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground
when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves
had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even
further when schools were required to get parental consent to
administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student; but could not inform
parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense
took a beating when you couldn’t defend yourself from a burglar in your
own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense
finally gave up the will to live, after a woman failed to realize that a
steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap, and
was promptly awarded a huge settlement. Common Sense was preceded in
death, by his parents, Truth and Trust, by his wife Discretion, his
daughter Responsibility, and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 4
stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, I Want It Now, Someone Else Is To Blame,
I’m A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he
was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, do nothing.”
author unknown
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